Sometimes, we love our dogs a little “too” much. Sometimes we don’t want to “command” our dog. We want to pamper them. We want to let them have fun. We want to praise their silly behaviors and give them as many treats as we can for being so cute and loveable.

But one thing we have to remember about this instinct is that our dogs are not human beings. They do not understand the world the way we do, and their idea of what is normal and – perhaps most importantly – safe is not how we see it.

That is why it is important to re-frame how you view speaking to your dog, training your dog, and what to understand about dog behavior.

Dogs, Packs, and Social Hierarchies

Dogs are social animals that naturally understand hierarchies, stemming from their ancestral pack behaviors. In a pack, there is a social order – an alpha, a beta, all the way to the lowest in the pack, the omega. Wolves and dogs, unlike people, do not view being the omega as being “less than.” Rather, it is just a place in the structure of the pack – something necessary for survival.

Your family is also a pack, and knowing their place within the family provides dogs with a sense of security and order. Without this structure, dogs can become anxious, exhibit problematic behaviors, and struggle to fit into the household routine. They may also show typical behaviors of their pack status towards other members of the pack. For example, if you’re an alpha and one of the dogs “under” you is out of line, it is your job to growl and help them understand their place.

This is where some dog owners struggle. They may treat their dog in such a way that their dog doesn’t know or understand where it is in the pack, and will then act in unwanted ways towards other family members.

Establishing and maintaining a clear structure not only benefits the dog but also promotes a more harmonious relationship between pets and humans. A family where the dog recognizes its position can avoid many of the common behavioral challenges that arise when a dog feels confused or unsure about its role.

Key Psychological Benefits for Dogs

But how your dog acts towards your family is not the only benefit. Dogs that know where they are in the pack can actually be psychologically – and in some cases, physically – healthier.

When a dog knows its place in the family, it not only behaves in a more appropriate way, but it also experiences significant psychological benefits. Dogs naturally look for leadership and guidance from the humans in their household, just as they would from the leader of a pack. This clarity provides benefits that include:

• Reduced Anxiety – Clear expectations and boundaries help dogs feel more secure, minimizing the confusion that may cause stress and behavioral problems.
• Increased Confidence – A dog that knows its role and has consistent guidance will generally exhibit more confident behavior, which is important for its emotional well-being.
• Clear Decision-Making – Dogs are less likely to engage in disobedient or destructive behavior when they know their place in the family. They look to their owners for direction, making it easier for them to make appropriate choices based on established rules.
• More Positive Responses – Similarly, not only will your dog experience better behaviors, but you will as well. Dogs can sense when you’re angry and frustrated, or when they’ve contributed to pack disharmony. When they know their place, you are also going to be happier, which will make them happier as well.

A dog that understands its place in the family will tend to exhibit better behavior and obedience. Dogs that lack guidance or face inconsistent leadership often try to fill the vacuum by assuming roles they are not equipped to handle. This can result in dominance-based behavioral issues such as excessive barking, resource guarding, or even aggression.

These benefits are not just psychological, either. Dogs that experience less stress and more happiness should be expected to live longer and have fewer health issues. Thus, by establishing a clear hierarchy, owners set the stage for a dog to behave appropriately, feel comfortable in its role, and possibly lead a longer and happier life.

Establishing the Dog’s Place in the Family

Creating a healthy dynamic where a dog understands its role within the family requires consistent training, clear boundaries, and reinforced leadership. It is important to recognize that this does not involve harsh discipline, but rather calm and assertive guidance.

To establish a dog’s place in the family:

• Consistent Training and Reinforcement – Training should be done with patience and consistency, using positive reinforcement to reward appropriate behavior. This reinforces the dog’s understanding of its position within the family structure.
• Clear Rules and Boundaries – Establishing household rules helps dogs understand what is acceptable behavior. For example, defining specific areas of the house where the dog can and cannot go or setting feeding times to establish routine.
• Calm Assertiveness from Family Members – Owners need to provide clear leadership through calm and assertive actions. This means setting rules, enforcing them consistently, and not allowing the dog to dictate its own behavior.

In addition, we need to reframe the way we view things like commands. When we tell our dog to “Sit,” for example, we’re actually helping the dog understand its place better, which in turn is better for our dogs. Teaching our children to give our dogs commands can help this even further.

Consistency is also important. Letting a dog misbehave sometimes because it’s cute or you don’t want to be too firm with the dog can lead to confusion. It is helpful to your dog for you to be firm and to show your dog its place in the pack.

When all family members are on the same page regarding the dog’s place in the household, it strengthens the dog's understanding and reinforces positive behavioral patterns.

Strengthening the Bond Between Dog and Family

A dog that understands its role in the family feels more secure, which enhances the overall relationship with its human family members. This bond is strengthened through mutual respect, clear communication, and a predictable structure. Dogs thrive on routine, and when they know their place, they are more content and cooperative.

Helping a dog understand its place in the family is not about dominance but about providing the structure and clarity it needs to thrive. Dogs that understand their role in the household are more likely to exhibit stable behavior, experience less anxiety, and form stronger bonds with their family.

By providing consistent leadership, setting clear boundaries, and reinforcing positive behaviors, owners can create a healthy environment where their dog feels secure and confident. This structure benefits not only your family, but the dog’s health and wellness as well.

For more information, or to get help with dog training, contact Marc Goldberg, today.